Saturday, April 13, 2013

Sucked into the grey...

So...a friend sent me Fifty Shades of Grey for free. I finished my book club book and figured, eh, why not. It's something I can read in between and can stop anytime to read my next book. I've heard from women how amazing it is, and I mean I like porn as much as the next person and would probably enjoy reading some.

I'm just over 2 chapters in...and wow. This is the worst written book I have ever read. Now I am NOT a writer, my grammar and spelling is horrible and this is why I do not get paid to write. I cannot believe most women made it through the first chapters to even get to the sex! I lost count of how many time his 'lips were pressed into a hard line' and the continuous descriptions of lips, eyes, hair...and unfortunately not in a sexy way. Was there really the need for the extremely detailed description of turning on and using her ipad? And the "oh crap, he's mad" "holy shit an iPad" I'd rather not read all her thoughts because they make me want to punch her in the face.

Last night I was actually growing angry while continuing to read. It's like the author said, "Well I can't just write a book of sex scenes so I'll add a bunch of random shit in between." could have just written an entire book of sex scenes...and you should have. Then I realize the writing kind of matches the acting in the worst porns, what should I expect? I really hope the sex is worth wading through all this verbal vomit.

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